My
Life
Sucks
...
Seriously.
I am so SICK of putting on a SMILE everyday.
I feel so FAKE.
Everything that you see,hear are all LIES.
Behind that fake self of mine, I keep thinking about all the words people fling at me.
I just wonder:
What's so wrong with me?
Why are my friends leaving me?
Do I even deserve them as my friends in the first place?
Maybe everything's my fault to begin with.
Although I feel lucky and blessed to have Leen,Haz,Grace,Jaslyn&Karyi as close friends.
Something is missing, but I don't know what it is...
And then I wonder why am I always obliging whatever my cousin says?
I should have my own opinions, but no.
I am too cowardy to stand up for what I think is right...
Seriously, I don't have a backbone.
I think God made a mistake placing me in 5N...
The fortune teller even said that I'll be in ITE.
But then we cannot always trust these facts.
Should I just commit sucide or something?
To the hell with it...
Thinking of Death is not the right way out.
I don't want my family to be in a misery.
But... I don't want to put up a show anymore.
Everyday, I put on that mask because I do not want others to worry.
But then it has now become a habit...
But I hate it. I don't want it anymore...
I just want to isolate myself from the rest of the world...
Take the keys and lock myself in, Forever.
The world would be better off without me, really.
Note: Before you start flooding my tagbox, which I highly doubt you will.
No one visits anyway.
But with a just in-case note:
I am not suffering from depression.
I am suffering from isolation in my heart.
